A Dream To Achieve

This is a simple releasing of thoughts, so it might sound corny.

June 10 2013.

    The day made me tired. Well it was the first day of school and I felt so sloppy and sleepy. I was in school for about 8 hours, I met cool friends – 2 of my first friends smoke cigarettes (it was only lunch time when I knew they do, so Ii kinda spaced out a bit), and pretty much the rest of them are the funny types.
I woke up early cause i couldn’t wait for the 1st day of school but the teachers weren’t there for the 1st and 2nd period of class. Math and Filipino were amazing. (I guess)
So to sum it up. . The day went pretty well.

Time check 9:47pm.

I stared at the ceiling thinking of the months that passed by. I reminisced. A time portal hidden beneath the neurons in my mind transported me to the times where I fought bloody fights with my mom. A war brought by chaotic ideas about careers and future. I remember screaming at the top of my lungs that I don’t want to go to college in IIT!! and then another scene flashed it was when I cried and pleaded to my mom that I want to be enrolled in IIT ( Reasons were: Love life, band, friends, and mom). Those kinds of fights didn’t just happen once or twice but in many n-times. That’s my dark side.
Anyway. As I stroll through my timeline (not referring to Facebook timeline) I saw myself promising at people that I will never leave them. . I relied so much in fate and destiny but its aces were nothing but an illusion to make me settle with the norms. Graduation day came and its theme flashed in my mind “MSU-IIT: GOING BEYOND BORDERS” that sudden frame shook my body as if I have heard my dad’s voice saying “See ken the omens are telling you to go beyond borders. It tells you to get out of your comfort zone” . . . So it was decided. I was to venture as Magellan did. To Cebu and beyond!!!

     Before I took the great leap. I spent the remaining days in Iligan: Recording, performing, hanging out with the most beloved friends, spending just a short time with her, and cuddling mom. Until. .  I step right in to the vessel that would take almost everything from me 😦 that was a sad moment. . I didn’t know if my decision was right. .
I have left them. I have left my passion behind, holding that microphone in front of the people who’d fill their ears with music, recording songs with your friend who taught you what music is. I have left her behind, those “kilig” moments, those promises, those hopes and dreams that you’ve planned and discerned for so long. I have left my friends, their laughter, their jokes and even their presence. Yes, I find it painful. Very painful.

     But as the days go by, I have learned so many things. I have learned to dream the dream of God for me. I grew up :)) those pains made me realize that if life’s simple goal is about staircase of reaching and achieving your dream or purpose then Ive ascended up the ladder and I’m slowly reaching my goal my dream my true passion. All these circumstances, were disguised staircases. People, places, events, will power and God’s presence are the ones giving me the push 🙂

I miss you guys. Thank you for everything.